HERE COMES AGITA,
HERE COMES AGITA
AFTER A BIG CHRISTMAS MEAL
THREE TURKEYS AND STUFFIN’, GOTTA EAT MY FIGGY PUDDIN’
BEFORE IT STARTS TO CONJEAL
MY HEART RATE’S THUMPINGAND MY TUMMY IS A GRUMBLING
SOMETHING JUST DOESN’T FEEL RIGHT
NOT SURE IF I SHOULD VOMIT OR GO SIT ON THE TOILET
CAUSE I’LL NEVER GET TO SLEEP TONIGHT.

HERE COMES AGITA
HERE COMES AGITA
AFTER A BIG CHRISTMAS MEAL
MASHED POTATOES AND GRAVY, RICHARD SIMMONS COULDN’T SAVE ME
WITH HIS GODDAMN DEAL A MEAL!
I’VE EATEN SO MUCH STUFF, BUT I JUST CAN’T GET ENOUGH
I CAN FEEL IT SLOWLY COMING BACK UP
GOTTA TRY TO WASH IT DOWN, DON’T WANNA STAIN MY NIGHTGOWN
IF I SHOULD HAPPEN TO UPCHUCK.

HERE COMES AGITA,
HERE COMES AGITA
AFTER A BIG CHRISTMAS MEAL
THREE TURKEYS AND STUFFIN’, GOTTA EAT MY FIGGY PUDDIN’
BEFORE IT STARTS TO CONJEAL
MY HEART RATE’S THUMPINGAND MY TUMMY IS A GRUMBLING
SOMETHING JUST DOESN’T FEEL RIGHT
NOT SURE IF I SHOULD VOMIT OR GO SIT ON THE TOILET
CAUSE I’LL NEVER GET TO SLEEP TONIGHT.

HERE COMES SANTA CLAUS
HERE COMES SANTA CLAUS
AFTER A BIG CHRISTMAS MEAL
HE’S LOOKING FOR LEFTOVERS, NOTHING LEFT BUT RUSSELL STOVERS
AND A FRUITCAKE A THIEF WOULDN’T STEAL!
MY EARS ARE RINGING AND MY ASSHOLE IS SINGING
I’M BREAKING INTO A SWEAT
I’VE DISAPPOINTED SANTA NOW I’M CHUGGIN ON MYLANTA
AND THAT LAST FART WAS LOUD AND WET.